I truly wish I was blogging a bit more often.  It seems my “New life in Maine” has been hectic and without a studio, I have felt like a fish without gills.  BUT it seems that is coming to a close and I will be moving into my petite studio on campus tomorrow.  A girl shouldn’t complain but it is quite small.  Regardless, it has four walls, a window, and a door, so I am happy.

The past number of weeks haven’t been without excitement however as I launched out Warhol Exhibition at the Reed Gallery, where I am director.  I also co-organized a benefit auction to raise money for a Cultural Center in town.  All of that came to fruition on Friday night with a wonderful reception from the community.

The auction was a great excuse to be required to make some artwork for a change.  I really enjoyed getting the creativity flowing again because I have felt so bottled up and stilted for what seems like too long.  I miss it in my life and try to make due in my home but hate the mess it creates and only begin to get grumpy when art supplies take over my living space.  Needless to say, having a studio away from my home the past few years before moving here really spoiled me.

So our auction had one requirement- to use a 10×10 canvas.  Me loving a square, had no problem biting into a composition.  Quite honestly, this little piece ended up being a result of a connection of dots in a few previous pieces I have done this year.  After creating the sojourner series for the Croft show last summer- I realized how much I loved the compass mark.  There was a such levity in the weight it carried when repeated over and over again.  Like there was somewhat a level of personal penance in each swing of the pencil.  I loved the control it seemed to imply although in close examination, there is such lack of order, controlled chaos, if you will, and I think we all live our lives with a measure of that- no matter who we are or what we do.

Since I have moved to Maine, it hasn’t been without difficulty.  I miss home so incredibly bad and although I have beautiful angels here in friends, colleagues, and students, I do miss my life I had at home.  I hate that sometimes it becomes a “here vs there” scenario because there is certainly level of enjoyment in both places.  I have learned a lot of myself here and I have discovered things in myself that I have not realized but that, in turn, seems to leave behind other aspects of myself.  And I do miss those things.

How does one negotiate their “wholeness” in a situation like this?  It’s not something I have an answer to but I am doing the best that I can.

So here is the piece I created for 10×10 entitled “You Are Here.”  It’s about all of this and served as a vehicle to sort out some of that internal negotiation.  I’m really looking forward to revisiting this in some pieces this summer.

The first was back in Pennsylvania where I had the opening for Homefront Hereos: Women of WWII.  This was an invitational exhibit sponsored by Penn State LV.  It was a pretty fun show to work on.  The artists were given archives to research and study and then devise a plan for the show.  I worked from the aspect of the drafting courses that women were taking at Penn State to later create mold for machine parts that were for the war.

I thought about how much this was a “game changer” (sorry I watch a lot of msnbc where they keep talking about that Sarah Palin film on HBO) for the feminist movement.  Women were not called to action because of oppression, it was out of nationalism.  Women became empowered by the new responsibilities and abilities.

My piece is about that.  It is also the personal struggles a woman would face by the changing world and what she expected for her life.  This was depicted by the use of text as the portrait (no, that isn’t a photo, it’s actually, song lyrics from the #1 song in 1941, Kiss the Boys Goodbye- they were built up to create the image).  The light boxes reference the drafting and are a metaphor for a “life’s drafting” as symbolized as the generic house.  The metal item dropped from one box is a dual suggestion of the war as well as the “part” she made.

Here’s me with the other artists:

This show happened on March 1 and on March 2, H(squared) opened.  In Maine.  The week was absolutely insane.  No.  Correction.  The 2 months prior had been absolutely insane.  No.  Correction…. well, you get the picture.  You may not realize but I STILL don’t have a studio here in Maine.  Don’t even get me started.  So my apartment became ground zero for a few months, complete with running my chopsaw on the kitchen island.  It was not my favorite moment and probably caused even more stress than what was needed the past few months.  What I hoped to make for H(squared) became so impossible that I had to “bump a project up in the cue” that had not yet been totally cooked.  It’s really tough to work that way since so much time goes into figuring out where new work is going.  So every last minute is put into that piece getting viewable by a public…. and the new one I’m still not sure what I feel about it yet(not to mention the constant slide projector problems that I’ve had).

ANYWAY, an amusing story will be the trouble I got myself into while trying to finish this piece.

Living in Presque Isle has it’s challenges.  All my random weird materials that I would like to easily pick up are not easy so get here.  If it’s not at Walmart then chances are it should be mail ordered.  That’s ok- until you’re int he 11th hour and you’re ready to cry at the drop of a pin because your now perfect solution to a problem is flocking.  Where in the world do I get flocking in PI?

So I installed about 75% of my show and left for PA.  While in PA where I know all my weird places to go for materials, I don’t find flocking (WHERE IN THE WORLD DO YOU BUY FLOCKING????)  but I do find decent air dry clay, matte mod podge, and red, semi-sparkly play sand.  So I make these little blobs of red grainy sparkliness and I couldn’t be happier.

The following day I pack my carry on, complete with red magic, and leave for my 6am plane.  I slept two hours.

I get to the Philly airport and start in my TSA routine.  I know to take off my boots, coat, sweater.  I know to unload my laptop.  I know to take out my bag of 3 oz or smaller liquids and I keep my ID and boarding pass on me until I’m through.  I’m no newbie.  My boots don’t have laces.  I’m not wearing excess jewelry.  And I never wear a belt. Yet, I get pulled over by the TSA.  Why?

Shit.

Red magic.

So I tell the guy that I’m an artist and he isn’t all that impressed.  They start off my searching through my hair. Then the unloading of my luggage begins.  And all the swabs, droppers, sticky tabby things begin.  And the relentless back and forth to the xray machine.

It started to cross my mind that my red magic may be taken or destroyed and WTF will I do with the show back in PI?

Panic.

Giggle a bunch (because that’s what I do when I’m nervous).

Pull on Hair.

Explain to guard that I really need the red magic to make it to PI.

No answer. (swab swab swab)

Undo all the red magic pieces and show them they are harmless.

(swab swab swab)

xray.

TSA: “so you’re really an artist?”

Me: Yeah

TSA: are you famous?

Me: One day.

TSA: do you have a card?

Me:  You can have two.  Pass it on to your friends.

TSA:  You can pack it up and head to your gate.

The piece was put together later that day and opened that evening (with my work from the sojourner series and Hyrum Benson’s work, my friend and colleague at UMPI). It’s entitled “Estuary.”  I think it’s still a work in progress.  And I’m desperately seeking a studio resolution before I lose my mind.

Well, it feels like a billion years since I have had anything of any worth to report.  I wrapped up last semester and trucked on home with Marigold in tow to celebrate the holidays.  One of my main objectives, however, was to catch up with friends and visit all the new changes in their lives.  Obviously, I surround myself with creativity so I’m going to share with you the beautiful studios 3 of my friends settled into while I was away.

First I headed to Brooklyn to see Karla Stingerstein who is settled in at Pratt to finish up her MFA.  Above is the fuzzy image from her window of Manhattan….. pretty picturesque.  Chrysler Buidling; Brooklyn Bridge.  I’m making you imagine a little bit (but I do have a crisp image I’m not sharing with you- hahaha).

Here’s a view of her space.  Pretty much what everyone would imagine their Brooklyn studio to look like….  only it’s all hers!

Then returning to home to the Lehigh Valley, Adriano Farinella and Berrisford Boothe, both former artists at the Banana Factory with me, set up shop in the Karl Stirner building in Easton.  It’s a pretty sweet space and beautifully finished.  There was much drooling when I walked through the doors.  The first image is Berrisford’s side then following is Adriano’s.

Studio space has been in the forefront of my mind as I am still waiting for mine new space to be made available for move in.  I’ll definitely share once settled in……

IN the meantime, I also have been thinking about these decadent cupcakes I had at Cakejoy in Brooklyn….. they were really really good.

So it feels like a BILLION years since I last wrote.  This new job paces at a consistent frantic but it’s not to say it hasn’t been fun and rewarding (with a side of anxiety laden).  The big news is (and if you are on Facebook, you already know this) I have accepted the additional duty of the Reed Fine Art Gallery Director and have been training my brains out every spare moment I can get with the retiring Director, Sandy (thanks, sweetie!).  I wish I could share with you the weight and intensity of holding the campus collection of 100 Andy Warhol photographs in my hands last week.  Wow.  It’s pretty cool.

But in that time were I accepted my position, I have also wrapped up my weaving class and now don’t know quite what to do with myself on Tuesday nights.  So instead Tuesday nights have been replaced with class prep and grading.  Jealous, much?  I wanted to share with you however the poem that Carol, our teacher, wrote to surmise the 8 weeks.  Weaving class is far better than evenings grading.

There is something to be said about an out of body experience.  I think we all have had them- for good reasons or bad.  And it becomes a situation where your instincts take over and your brain follows behind.  I have to say I’m not entirely comfortable with public speaking.  Yes, I do believe I understand the irony on that being that my job requires public speaking on a daily basis.  This has been something that have grappled with for years.  I used to throw up before classes when I started teaching and now I just have the flurry of butterflies that occupy my stomach from time to time.  It’s an improvement, at least but get me into a scenario where I have never been- well, those butterflies are flutter a bit more crazily.

Last Friday, I debuted my work in my new hometown of Presque Isle.  My exhibit was at Cafe Sorpreso and part of the First Friday Art Walk.  I put up 18 or 19 pieces from my Iniciar show.  It was an absurdly hurried day since I had only slept about 2 hours because of worrying about 2 of the pieces coming off the Fed Ex plane just in the nick of time of putting up the show.  It’s a long and convoluted story not worth telling here- but I am reconsidering my use of the services of Fed Ex.  (ahem)

So I rushed about my day until finally the opening arrived….  like any other First Friday I have been to, people scurried from one thing to the next and for me being the newbie in town, I didn’t expect so many to come out, which set my expectations rather low.  I pumped up the show in my classes all week and even though many students nod their heads and sound like they will come- I am realistic and it IS a friday night.  Would that actually happen?

I was due to speak at 8:15.  I barely ate dinner.  People started to trickle in- more and more were faces I recognized.  My last count, close to the time I was to speak, was around 70 people.  I’ve had very few situations where I have spoken to a room more than 30-50 people.  Let me just tell you, the extra 20+ bodies REALLY up the anti!

8:15 rolls around- Judy turns off the music- Cliff leans in and tells me we’re going to get started.  After his introduction, people applaud.  But then the applause continues, and someone whistles, and someone yells out- I don’t know what happened to me however I somewhat think for the first time in my life that I can relate to Arsenio Hall.  Something in me had me jump up and down and then where a fleeting fist pump came in, I couldn’t tell you.  Again- mind out of body, body working on it’s own- I am sure that is how Arsenio Hall started his fist pump/crank and “roo roo roo” (I wiki-ed that because I did not know how to spell the sound associated with his fist pump).

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arsenio_Hall

Ok- WHY DID I DO THAT???  Quite honestly, never in my life have I had such a reception.  I have had some enthusiastic clapping.  I’ve turned around a room with speaking but never as I was introduced did I have such warmth.  This makes Presque Isle so much different.

I am not quite sure how long I spoke- maybe 15 minutes.  I hope I sounded articulate.  I don’t think I “roorooroo-ed” but hopefully I made some sense.  One can only hope.

Let me just say, moving to Presque Isle has not been without it’s difficulties, but as I have settled in, I am daily reminded that this was a great choice.  Will I continue fist pumping?  I’m not sure.  Stranger things have happened- it just may be my new thing.

This week I came to the realization that I could burn out.  It happens, I guess and with few distractions to keep me from my job I’m realizing that that whole balance thing I had been working on is in somewhat of jeopardy.  So when I went to weaving class this week, it turned out to not be much of a weaving night but more a night to decompress a bit and chat with the other women.  Maybe it’s in the air but many of my classmates that night were a bit fried.

Anyway, I have been so antsy pantsy about getting to work in my still to be determined studio space- since I am working with the University on this, it seems to move at a molasses pace to make any amount of progress HOWEVER my studio space in part of another exciting development in my position here in Maine, which I cannot share with you quite yet.  But I am excited.

What I can share with you is the cool view from my building.  This week the building where I teach was ReDedicated, debuting it’s complete renovation as part of the campus’ mission to reduce it’s carbon footprint.  The building has been updated with solar panels on the roof, a new biomass furnace that uses pellets made from a local supplier, energy efficient siding and windows, and removed all the asbestos floor and ceiling tiles.  It’s pretty cool to see such commitment to a concept.

So my colleague, Hyrum, and I were able to get on the roof and explore a bit the other day and shot some pics.  I’m glad the snow held off a few days so you can see the expanse of solar panels with the wind turbine in the distance.  Mad cool.

(I have a bunch of stuff to post when I get a chance so stay tuned- in the meantime, I need make progress on my plan for my showing next week here in Presque Isle.  I’m more stressed out about it than I really should be).

you shall above all things be glad and young.

For if you’re young, whatever life you wear

it will become you;and if you are glad
whatever’s living will yourself become
Girlboys may nothing more than boygirls need:
i can entirely her only love

whose any mystery makes every man’s
flesh put space on;and his mind take off time

that you should ever think,may god forbid
and(in his mercy)your true lover spare:
for that way knowledge lies,the foetal grave
called progress,and negation’s dead undoom.

I’d rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance

-e.e. cummings

I love e.e.cummings.  I have for years.  I heard this poem, read by Garrison Kellier, while on the road last week.
His work is incredibly special to me.  And this poem, as I drove down I-95, reminded me that I only live once and I should love heartedly and thank goodness for opportunity.  xoxo

In case you are in Spain, go to this show and then tell me all about it.  I will be dying to see pics of my work there (which Sergio is always so kind to share them with me).   As soon as I have them, I will happily pass them along to you!

(and for the women whom I told you the show was in a slaughterhouse- my apologies, I thought I read that somewhere in my correspondence!)

But Starbucks bellowed out it’s siren song once it knew I was about to embark on a road trip south.  As soon as I rolled into Augusta, I pulled over and walked into the first Starbucks I saw.  When the woman asked me how I was- I exploded with giddiness telling her is was my first Starbucks in 2 months since I had moved to Aroostook County.  I ordered a ginormous Venti Caramel Macchiato.  I don’t even order those at home because of all the calories and sugar but it had been 2 months.  I was going to whoop it up with decadence!!  Needless to say, I was buzzing the entire weekend from Starbucks as I set out to sight see Connecticut.

I was staying in Old Saybrook.  It is at the mouth of the Connecticut River and a picturesque town to explore full of marinas, water, shops, and restaurants.  And complete with a cute lighthouse…..It seems it’s a good place to vacation or just drive around, which is what we did.

Saturday evening, I made my way over to Ivoryton which is an even more picturesque town (or section of Essex) where Katherine Hepburn and Marlon Brando used to do summer theater at the Ivoryton Playhouse.  I was happy to be included in the “Juxtaposed” exhibition at the Six Summit Gallery, curated by Alyssa Monks.  Actually.  This exhibit, of which I saw the work online on their facebook page, was much more impressive in person than online.  I guess there is something to be said for the one-to-one experience of artwork rather than through the filter of a computer screen.

The show, although not advertised as a figurative show, was primarily figurative.  Probably because Alyssa herself is a figurative artist.  Some of the images in the show were just arresting to look at.  The gallery itself seemed small however in walking in the amount of work was just astounding.  It was a great turnout of people and I spoke with many people about my process- which I am always so surprised when people want to hear about it.  I don’t know why.  But overall I enjoyed meeting some of the other artists, viewing the work, and later thai food.  It also had been 2 months since thai food.

For more information on the exhibition, visit www.sixsummitgallery.com

The drive itself was long.  LONNNGGGGGG.  But what was super cool about that was how much the foliage changed as you progressed up I-95.  In Maine, the leaves are amber, crimson, and ochre where south of that, they are only starting to change.  It only seemed coincidence that I arrived at the scenic turnout to see Mt. Katahdin at dusk.  SO MAGICAL!  And I made it home a half an hour than I thought I would- probably because the speed limit was recently changed from 65 mph to 75 between Bangor and Houlton.  Thank god.

I have been pretty busy it seems!  While it would appear that I have not made much progress in my weaving class, I did take some time last week to peruse the book Carol brings into class.  I hadn’t had too much time with it yet but since I have been somewhat weaving with no end result in mind, I thought I would at least leaf through it so see if it would suggest a direction for what I am doing.  It seems it has just enforced that all I want to do is “free form” my weaving.  Which is what I am doing.

What I did learn from the book however was really awesome.  I know that having an art practice can be both a cerebral and emotional experience.  I also know that it is incredibly spiritual.  I began to read about the design of the loom from this book and it was so satisfying to find the significance that this structure has in it’s construction.  So what I am saying, dear reader, I am ok with just weaving and being present for that process.  I know that the process impacts the subconscious.  Being I am constantly stimulated with so much that is new and something I need to adapt to, process, or respond to- “being” seems like it would be simple.  Much like the shavasana in yoga, it is the pose that in appearance seems the simplest but in reality is the hardest.  To just allow oneself to simply be…

Prior to that realization, I spent the weekend still getting to know the Maine countryside.  Being a fan of apple cider but never actually seeing the process of apple pressing, a bunch of us went on out into Carol’s woods and shook some trees free of their apples.  It was such an exciting yet exhausting sequence of events.  Last weekend was apparently unseasonably warm and we were able to meander the grounds with wheelbarrows, ladders, and glasses of wine.  I think apple picking should always include a little of that!  I’ll end this posting with a bit of a “photo journal” of how the day progressed (a bit out of order but the blog gallery does not want to cooperate with me!)- it was beautiful.  The food was amazing (as always). And we each left with a gallon of apple cider (with many, many apples to spare!).  AND YES, I have a new love for chickens.  You see me with Faustina, Gert, Ava, and Myrna- the cutest chickens ever.