I was unpacking some boxes and I came across this image that I had framed from a Kiki Smith exhibit a number of years ago.  I decided to write you tonight about the time I almost met her,(who is also one of my idols).  I mean, it’s actually kind of funny how it happened and far more interesting than running down the grind of the beginning of the semester, which frankly has been a little stressful due to the fact it’s just a brand new place with new facilities to familiarize myself with…. not that interesting of a read for you.

I moved back to the east coast ten years ago (come to think of it, almost to the day! which is unfortunately marked by 9/11).  When I moved back, my sister and then boyfriend, now husband still where living in Philadelphia where I left them to move to Seattle.  When I moved back, I was staying with my parents and saving up to make my next move to Rhode Island.  Yup, little known fact- I almost deserted PA for Rhode Island but life happened and there I stayed.  I liked to get to Philly whenever possible because I was discovering I didn’t hate it as much as I thought I did.  Soon, I hear that one of my biggest idols is completing her residency at the Fabric Workshop and I decide to see it as soon as possible.  I had missed her lecture but was there the following weekend with my family in tow to see her work in person for the first time.

This was a big deal to me.
The Fabric Workshop used to be a few floors up on Cherry Street.  Now it’s a gorgeous museum and workshop on Arch and worth a visit if you can.  www.fabricworkshopandmuseum.org When you entered, you walked through a seated area, lounge straight the the exhibition space.  To the right was the studio where you could tour the production area and in between was the gift shop.  For some reason, I saved the show for last and toured the work area first.  It was pretty docile that day and not too much going on.  I then trickled into the exhibition and viewed that.  Everyone exited before me and I stayed in a bit later to spend some time with the show.

Low and behold, Kiki walks in the room.  For real.  I was not dreaming.  She starts to adjust a glass bat that was hanging from the ceiling and I kinda just stared at her for a moment and then left.  It may have been 10 or so years ago but I remember this clear has day.  My sister is in the gift shop and I walk over to her like I need to cue her on our next move in a bank heist.  I start to whisper that Kiki is in the next room and she asked me, “What are you going to do?”  I had no answer to that.

My dad sees that I’m acting *really strange.*  And he asks us what is going on- my sister translates for me since I can barely get a word out and he tells me to go introduce myself.  INTRODUCE MYSELF??  WHAT?  My dad then bargains with me and holds the carrot over my head that he’d buy all the Kiki books in the bookstore for me if I would introduce myself to her.  Being that I had $12.50 to my name and a sincere book addiction, I had to seriously weigh my options.

Breaking me down, I ask him what would an acceptable interaction.  He wanted to me to introduce myself then tell her how much of an impact she has had on my process.  Uh.  Ok.  I work myself up to the task.

By now, Kiki crosses into the lounge where I walk in her vicinity and then we meet eyes, I open my mouth and nothing comes out.  Finally I say, “how are you doing” and she nods her head in acknowledgement and keeps on.  I turn around to see my dad and sister watching me and I ask if that was enough.  Of course, it wasn’t even close.

It’s funny to have an “idol worship” of another person.  I mean, they are people after all but I am so guilty of being starstruck at times.  I admire talent tremendously whether it is art, music, whatever.  I don’t know if that would ever change about me.  I mean if Tom Waits walked up to me and wanted to know what time it was, I would probably bumble and fall over my words.  And I imagine him to be a completely chill guy.  (Here’s an amazing Ted Talk that Elizabeth Gilbert did about creativity.  She did an interview with Tom Waits when she used to write for a magazine and speaks of him and inspiration.  I love it.)

But why idolize?  Everyone has an idol or idols.  Everyone imagines their optimal self.  I just happen to love the ripple in the pond effect that admiring one person has.  Many times that person is in turn admired by others (not implying that I am).  But let’s say that I am admired… why would that be and does that change how I am?  I think there is something to be said about leaving a lasting impression.  I am in my new job and meet new people on a daily basis.  Is it beneficial to me to act a certain way because it’s what they expect of me or is it better to just let it all hang out?  I guess there is a balance between them both.  I mean coming to a small town as an Art Professor, people already have an opinion about who they think I am.  And if I countered that with every hot mess moment, that could just alienate myself from a potential network.  So I guess the best thing is: to allow people to know me as me but have moments that are entirely my own; remain the goofball while giving lectures because that is why I was hired;  ……And remain absolutely starstuck when Kiki Smith walks into a room.  She probably already knows she changed my life.

Well peeps, This may not be so much as an art centered post as it is to get you acquainted with the place I am moving to mid August.  I just returned from a trip to upstate Maine where I was apartment hunting (and begging people to be my friend) in Presque Isle, Maine.  The trip was a huge success and wonderful gage of how grueling trips back to PA will be while driving.  I don’t mean to scare you visitors, but it is grueling.  But may I suggest a wonderful stopover in Newburyport, Massachusetts?  Such a cute place with many cute bistros, shops in brick buildings along cobblestone walkways.  Lovely stop half way to seeing me… and right by the water!

Anyway, when you come to visit me, be prepared for the 12 hour drive.  It is a rewarding drive however.  It’s very pretty and as you meander through Maine you drive through Baxter State Park which has so many gorgeous trees and very few cars.  I somewhat feel like you are driving to the edge of the world.  Actually you just might be…

Presque Isle is a town that has just under 10,000 residents.  The university (pictured above) is small but making strides to be mighty progressive.  It is powered by a wind turbine which is part of President Zillman’s mission to reduce the carbon footprint of the university.  (http://bangordailynews.com/2010/05/18/news/umpi-windmill-lsquoa-great-decisionrsquo/)  In fact, the art department’s studio is currently being outfitted with solar panels, new windows, new boiler, and brand spankin’ new floors (no more asbestos!) in time for me to start in the fall.  Here’s what it looks like now… and may I say, we have the best view on campus!

I will be living right downtown.  It’s a quirky downtown that is transitioning to become more community centered with more cultural offerings.  Their First Friday has made it a year- even through the winter months!  Part of my job is to help the University have more of a presence in the community through the arts.  Cool for me!  So I’ll be looking to create some great events and opportunities- and you’ll may be hearing from me for installation proposals, community festivals, and art happenings.  I have IDEAS (and am starting on some grant funding to make them happen)!!

I will be living in what was originally the Elk Lodge (pictured above- I love this image because it reminds me of a Hopper painting!).  It’s SO COOL!  It’s a brick building built in 1919 and the interior is nearly entirely covered with pressed tin.  It’s really amazing.  I will be the first tennant occupying the the apartment in front of the building on the second floor.  When I first applied for the job, I was super bummed when I didn’t see a coffee shop around town for someone to hang out.  I even researched it extensively and I found that everyone goes to the diner in the hotel for their coffee.  That was fine and I but I do love that cafe culture and really wanted that in this place.  Ask and you shall receive because the storefront I am living over is going to be a coffee shop/bistro.  Really, REALLY!  And in the back of the building, there will be a boutique salon- um, yeah so I can eat, get my hair cut all in my own building.  Oh wait, you ask- where will I play pool, darts, and fussball when it’s freezing outside?  Well, in the basement there will be a lounge to do just that!  It was formerly the bowling alley.  The alleys are still in the basement.  It’s so incredible- and yes, the basement too has tin.  Probably the most lovely pressed tin in the whole place.

My apartment is under major construction so you have to have a great imagination about it.  Luckily I do.  Check it out…. the fireplace will stay and will be outfitted with a pellet stove.  How sexy is it to have a fireplace in your bedroom?  The windows will be replaced but still be the gargantuin size you see.  And yes, it has other ameneties too but I won’t go on….

The thing is that it’s about a block away from the restaraunt I continue to rave about.  I had a wonderful meal again while in town- a Morrocan Halibut Tagine as part of their Mediterranean themed night.  AND an incredible Red Sangria!  So when you come see me, get ready to eat at Sopresso, a cafe started by the guy who also started the Art Dept at UMPI in 1967.  Across the street is the Art and Framing shop as well as the yarn shop.  I have a feeling I will be knitting like a wild woman again.

Around the corner from me is the art center.  I love the building- and will need to take pictures when I make the move and give you the virtual tour of the town- right now you can create it in your mind!!

Behind Main Street is the river with great bike paths.  I think I want to get a bike again.

Oh and did I mention that the sun goes on and on…. It was full sun before 5am in the morning.  I was certain that I overslept for my 6am meeting before hitting the road to come home. Wow!

So all in all, I had a busy trip…. watch out Presque Isle.  Here I come!

I love the show the “Office.”  Yup, I do- Brit Office, Scranton Office- I love it.  So naturally the whole world now knows that Steve Carell has left the show and there is much speculation about what will happen with the show and who will fill his shoes.  I think it was his second last episode when everyone in the office gathered in the conference room and sang to Michael about keeping in touch.  That episode ended and Michael Scott said: “This is going to hurt like a Mother(beep)er.”

Well, my dear reader, I have news.  I will be leaving the Lehigh Valley.  Every year for the past 4 years I have had a ritual.  During Fall semester, around October, I would start to scour the CAA (College Art Association) job listings.  I would do it weekly and sometimes even daily and save a bunch of listings up until the semester broke for Winter Break.  Once I posted all my grades and completed my Christmas shopping, I would then get to work on my job applications.  This always included a letter of application, curriculum vitae, artist statement, teaching philosophy, student evaluations (yes, kids- they do count for something!), peer evaluation reports, transcripts, sample syllabi and rubriks,  personal portfolio (print and digital), student portfolio (print and digital), and sometimes publication samples.  One caters each packet to the job so each packet may have different components that are submitted, such as student work, personal work, syllabi, letter. 

 By the end of winter break, most packets are complete and ready to be submitted by deadlines that are typically during the first few weeks of classes.  Then I would wait and see what happens.  Rejection letters start to come in the mail around March and can be as late as May.  Some places even don’t send them so therefore I still don’t know (I’m talkin’ to you, U of Oregon!!).   If you get a call, then you prepare for a series of interviews.  I have gone through that process as well- which is typically a rigorous day of questions that comes at you from every direction.  Thank goodness I have had training from years of my mother’s interrogations!  A few years ago I was a final candidate at a University but not selected for the job.  It was not until this year that I had been granted another tenure track interview (I have had others- everytime I am employed with a new contract at Kutztown, I would have to go through another interviewing process which is like “tenure track light”). 

This past April I was flown to upstate Maine to do a three day interview.  Again, a very rigorous process of back to back meetings where I fielded many questions of my personal and professional qualifications.  I met with students, faculty members, administrators, campus leaders, community leaders, and fellow artists from the area.   At the end of day two, I gave an hour long lecture on my work, artist statement, student work, teaching philosophy, and personal influences.  I had been tweaking the lecture up until the morning of my interview (only sleeping 3 hours the night before).  I was running on adrenalen and fell to my bed on the first break I could get. 

A little over two weeks ago, I was sitting outside the Dali Museum in Florida and received a phonecall from the University Vice President of Academic Affairs.  It was THE JOB OFFER.  But I didn’t jump at it.  In fact, I had another job offer already on the table but this was the one I had been waiting to hear about and I got it.  Since returning from Florida, I have been little by little making the steps forward to initiate my departure.  (Obviously I accepted the job after careful consideration and an enormous pros and cons list).  I think it hasn’t started to settle in as real quite yet until the past few days. 

Tonight was First Friday at the studio.  It was my last.  I have had my studio at the Banana Factory for five years.  I feel like it was a place where i began to establish my professional studio practice.  After working in my home for so many years, having my studio there generated so much discipline and while creating art in a public space, it always held me accountable.  I didn’t really love First Friday in the beginning.  I didn’t like having to talk about my work as I was still sorting it out myself.  But years went on and I either became more comfortable with the answers I was providing AND very skilled at hiding what wasn’t ready to be discussed. 

As the studio practice built on itself, I also became more and more busy in my teaching career.  I worked at many places around the Lehigh Valley and even worked at a small university in Scranton, right before the Office made it’s debut here.  In fact, every time I watch the opening of the show, it reminds me off the drive I used to make a few times a week. I even remember the Scranton radio station (Froggy- the bumper sticker on Dwight’s filing cabinet) talked about the prospect of the sitcom being based there in Scranton.  It apparently wasn’t the only place they considered for the show.  Anyway, I digress…

This evening was full of beautiful people who visited me at the studio to send me off, whether they knew that walking through the door or not.  It was an incredible flurry of friends, former students, and studio regulars who know me at so many phases of my life here in Pennsylvania.  When I returned to the Lehigh Valley 10 years ago, it was not with the intention of staying.  I didn’t plan on starting a career here.  But I found jobs, found a husband, lost a husband, gained wonderful friends, re-connected with old friends, and established a closer relationship with my family.  I am grateful for every last moment.

I ended my First Friday evening with one of my old friends from high school, Joanna.  She was one of the last people in the studio tonight.  I don’t know what it is but I feel like without knowing so much of the story that she understood it.  I have worked my whole life for this.  She recalled me in high school and described how “art girl” I was.  I was- it was everything I thought about aside from all the other teenage girl stuff.  But she seemed to imply that it was the thing I have chased for 20+ years and this was my time.  She reminded me of just a few things I was and said and how proud she was that I “did it.”  This is the chapter closing and a very brand new one opening.  One that is built on the next…

I left Joanna with tears running down my face.  and maybe a little running down hers too.  Its funny, I always liked her- I didn’t know her as well as I know other people but she has a good heart.  And it’s really really nice when someone recognizes you and all that you work for.  She doesn’t have to know how hard it has been to get here.  She doesn’t have to know the details but it’s nice that someone knows it hasn’t been easy but I have finally been able to start the new chapter. 

So I will be leaving Pennsylvania in about two months for my new job at UMPI, Maine.  I never thought it would be but perhaps the writers of the Office understand that it would be hard to leave here… hard for me to leave here.  As Michael would say, “This is going to hurt like a Motherfucker.”

Just keep in touch because I will be thinking of you… xoxo

Last week, I was in Florida visiting my Grandmother and she was nice enough to take me to the brand spankin’ new Dali Museum.  I’m not sure how much she liked the work IN the museum but she definitely loved the building.  So did I and you should too because, it’s cool and all the cool kids are liking it.

I must have spent a portion of my former life in Spain because there is just so much synergy when it comes to me and Spanish work.  If you recall, I was living in Zaragoza 2 years ago close to the birthplace of Goya.  In fact, I would buy my bus ticket in the building that formerly was his art school.  So really, Zaragoza has adopted him as their hometown boy.  So when we arrived at the museum and took in the building view, we then went inside and had a prety darn authentic Spanish Omelette and Cafe con Leche- which I HAD to have since it was nostalgic and about the only thing I could order all by myself in Zaragoza.  That and gelato.  A girl has her needs, right?

The first gallery we entered after lunch as just incredible.  While I was in Zaragoza, Sergio took me to the Goya print collection.  200 political satire etchings all sequentially ordered and displayed.  The first gallery I walked into was those prints- but Dali had been given access to the plates, ran prints of his own, and painted back into the prints as if to collaborate with Goya.  It was incredible to see.  I would show you but I would have been tackled if I took pictures in the gallery.  You wouldn’t want that.  It would be ugly.  But I also viewed some wonderful and iconic self portraits, films he created solo and with surrealist film maker Luis Bunuel.  We then tagged along on a tour of his paintings.  I think my grandmother loved that.  And now I feel kind of bad that I didn’t tell her we should do that only because I think she enjoyed it a lot.  But we got to catch the tail end of it.  Quite honestly, I had NO IDEA that this museum had such MAJOR Dali pieces.  It was really awesome.  I got to see the massive and impressive Venus/Matador painting.  I never knew how huge it was.  Incredible.  The educator in me is telling you to go look it up.  (again, no pictures for fear of being tazed) but enjoy this little phone portrait of me and my Grandmother!

Anyway, if you ever get a chance to head to St. Petersburg, Florida- you should.  It is really beautiful and accessible and they aren’t even paying me to say that.  Plus, its where Ponce de Leon said the Fountain of Youth was.  Seriously, I look like at least 2 minutes younger than I did when I arrived.  Here’s a gorgeous street shot (outside the Chihuly Collection- which was nice but expensive and maybe not worth all the money).  But don’t end on that note- go, get young, trip out on some Dali and enjoy some Spanish tortilla.  There’s my endorsement!

]]> http://blog.heathersincavage.com/2011/05/23/1119/feed/ 1 http://blog.heathersincavage.com/2011/05/15/this-just-in-zaragoza-review/ http://blog.heathersincavage.com/2011/05/15/this-just-in-zaragoza-review/#comments Mon, 16 May 2011 00:54:33 +0000 heather http://blog.heathersincavage.com/?p=1117 Many of you know that my solo exhibition in Zaragoza opened on Thursday.  Sergio was kind enough to send me a link to my review… I had it translated here for you all to read.  You can also click the link if you are up for testing your Spanish.

Now I’m off for the week for some fun in the sun.  FLA here I come!!

http://www.elperiodicodearagon.com/noticias/noticia.asp?pkid=671445

“Symbol-metaphor lies a woman with feelings divided into drawers that are not always open, boxed feelings to which it is difficult emerge. And feelings lying almost dead. In front, a semi-stop window peep another female figure who wants to peek at all the world, but a structure in the form of bars imprisoning his wish by pressing the shutter. Oppressive structure in which, however, rebel fibers similar to cotton candy and sugar itself, which covers everything. Female identity is there, making clear to such adversity.

Described in the previous paragraph corresponds to two facilities Heather Sincavage, American artist scholarship from the Artix Creative Space for six weeks in 2009, included in the new exhibition at the gallery Calvo & Mayayo and which in a subtle way Not with the cry of protest, says the women felt about the situation in which a woman finds herself in our society.

And is that despite the struggle for equality, some things never change. But above all do not do feelings. And we do not want women and men we have, fortunately, differentiators, different emotions. Sincavage Hence, from the inside, feel the need to proclaim that part feminine singular or plural is still hurt by being buried, enclosed by education, tradition or cultural heritage.

Sincavage’s work is pure metaphor. It seeks to show the feminine identity through their self-portraits, in which mix various techniques (photo printed on panels or canvas, textured – metal, wood, newsprint, textiles – and organic matter – hair, sugar, branches , flowers – usually red paint, which makes it stand out and contrast shapes and colors).

With these materials, the author attempts to transport viewers to other worlds, to suggest that the definition of femininity, a search inside a woman, as a person and human being, as we said, it is revealed in a cry of protest, it serves no political burdens and struggles, but as something more transcendent. Hence, use his image, his body because his identity is that look yourself to be. And the feelings transmitted through the overlay material and emotional labyrinths boxes as overlapping feelings, feelings that can not be classified and create another major human feeling.”

So again, I am starting off my summer with much anticipation and trepidation.  I’m free to do what I may- and that will involve hours making at the studio.  I also can’t help to voice that without a traditional paycheck, it makes “carefree living” rather dampened but I have been faced with this predicament before.  And this may be the year that I figure it out.  I have heard on many of occasion that one is destined to repeat a problem until they have finally resolved it.  It does seem a little bit like a Sisyphusian plight.  How does one break the cycle?  Well, I am still working on it however I think honoring achievements is one place to start.

So thinking back from last year to this one, there are many, many changes.  As I wrapped last year’s school year, I rushed into the planning stages of my community project and then into teaching the summer session.  But I also had a goal to push my work into a larger market.  So with that goal in mind, my work made it to Texas and Philadelphia.  I also have made a conscious effort to expand on my studio practice.  Advancement does not come without re-invention and reinterpretation.  So the new work continues in that evolution.  But overall, I have been looking for developing and reaching a new audience.  I don’t quite know how that is panning out yet but I realize that not everything happens at once but I have great momentum that I am taking all the right measures to get there.  I also taken to marketing my work which is exciting.  Coming up this fall I will be featured in a lovely magazine that I will be sure to share with you.  AND As a plug, right here- right now, you should check out my work at URBN in the Gallery at Building 543 at the Philadelphia Naval Yard AND go soo my stuff at the JCC of Allentown in the small works exhibition, Ethereal Nature (with Adriano Farinella), then go to Zaragoza, Spain to see my solo exhibition open this Thursday. (I know, I am SHAMELESS!)

But back to what I am really trying to say…..

One has to pay attention to signs.  Last week, I received my fancypants Allentown Arts Commission Arts Ovation Award.  I woke up that morning and was still feeling sick and perhaps nervy.  I didn’t want to go.  I didn’t want my film to sound stupid.  I didn’t want to sit in a nearly sold out room and be a fool.  The film is short and above some of the other intelligent things I siad during the filming, maybe they picked a segment that I needed to hear myself.  Years ago, my work began in a place of pain however it is something I needed to experience.  There is where I realized that I am exactly where I need to be- and it’s a strange place to realize that you positioned yourself there.  So the direction I hope to be taking in whatever capacity it is presented to me, is for allowing people to realize their highest self.  The self  that is genuinely them.  This is a place I am proudly investigating for myself but I think I am far enough along that I may help others recognize it too.

As a result of my fancypants award, I had a day named after me.  A DAY!  So Heather Sincavage Day is May 5.  Peeps, as funny as it sounds, may this be a day to allow yourself to be just that.  It’s an important place to be.  I know that I can definitely cut myself to shreds with doubt and criticism so no one is perfect but for one day, say yes to you in all your creases, dimples, and imperfections.  It seems that sometimes lessons come in small, indescrete packages or like this one, with lights and sirens.

I’ve been waiting for weeks for a package from Sergio in Spain.  Sergio decided he would video parts of my trip so that he could have documentary that could accompany my work at exhibitions.  With my upcoming exhibit at Calvo i Mayayo next month, he was anxious to see what I thought about the film.  I recieved it today and watched it with many sentimental memories.  This is such a lovely document to my time there…. Please watch this and enjoy a little slice of my work there.

Some of the things that I love about the film are the nuances- at one point you can hear my ipod playing the same playlist I listened to daily while I was there.  You also see me prepped  for Spain’s NPR- you might see me a little overwhelmed there!  And of course you meet some of the sweet people I met there- Juan, Fernando, Silvia and of course, Sergio.

(Please don’t mind my over-smiley-ness- I was really happy to be there; and also note I was really sick in the beginning, I didn’t even recognize my voice!; and public apology to all my past students, I never realized how much I said UM!)

I received my show announcement for my solo exhibition ins Spain next month.  Needless to say, I’m dreaming of a chance to go but in the meantime, Sergio has been keeping me informed about the event- complete with a film he made about my residency there.  The documentary is enroute here to PA so as soon as I have it, I will upload it for you to see (and practice your Spanish).  If you just happen to be in Zaragoza next month, go check it out.

So many thanks go out to Sergio and Juan who have been handling my work there since my visit almost 2 years ago!