Ok so it’s been a few days since my last post but the mountains of things I have accomplished is wonderful! First of all….. I know that First Friday isn’t for a few weeks yet but you certainly will want to come out and see my newly revamped studio. It’s spacious- so spacious I could totally do cartwheels in it, but I won’t because it’s been a while and I don’t want to slam into my work on the walls. I totally still have the same work up- I’m going to try and push ahead on new work but I’m not sure how much that will happen with finals this week and next week. Grades are totally due but I have been quite the warrior about them and hope to be posting them by next Tuesday. HOPING.

But I don’t write to fill you in on my schedule. I thought that maybe I would continue on with excerpts and ramblings from my artist lecture. A constant in my work has been references to the body. I think this attention culminated in a perfect storm of events that connected around the time I was in Seattle. As you already know, I began studying the theme of Hamlet’s Ophelia.
sidenote- I totally geeked out last night and watched Hamlet on PBS. And can I just tell you it was this modern-ish version with David Tennant from Dr. Who playing Hamlet. Yup- I watch Dr. Who. I have since I was a kid. There’s a Heather funfact for you- I loves me some sci fi.

While looking to Pre-Raphealite painting, one thing that has always been apparent is the voluminous amounts of hair depicted on the women. During this study, I discovered that this was a purposeful choice of the painters. Hair, especially worn long and down, is representative of a juxtaposition of innocence and sexuality. Above is one of my favorite Millias paintings, entitled “The Bridesmaid.” I really love the Victorian method of symbolism in their paintings and it perhaps was formative in how I began to use metaphor and symbolism in my work. My opinion is that there is a profound connection to literature during the 19th century and something that perhaps we are not so connected to now. But we, as a society, seem to have replaced literature with movies, video games, and television- just a different way to tell a story with symbolism suggested in a new language of emoticons. All in all, one not better than the other- just different.

But again, I digress……. “The Bridesmaid” is a beautiful example the importance of hair. In this painting, the bridesmaid passes a piece of wedding cake through a wedding ring 5 times (Victorian tradition) in hopes to find her future husband. She wears an orange blossum on her gown which, according to the Victorian language of flowers, indicates innocence, eternal love, marriage and fruitfulness. The combination of these things indicates her desire and readiness to be married- her hair is down, suggestive she is young, innocent but also ready and willing/wishing to be married by wearing the orange blossum and doing the wedding ring custom. The lush amount of hair is certainly eye catching- I believe there is no question for a potential suitor that she is looking for a husband.

After completing this study, hair became something that I constantly thought about. To relieve stress during graduate school, I worked cleaning a bed and breakfast. Yes, I like to clean to relieve stress. I think I’ve confessed it before but new readers, now you know. Part of that job was eliminating any remnant of former guests in rooms and hair is typically the major culprit. I spent a summer on my hands and knees picking up as many hairs as I saw be it head hair, leg hair or pubic hair. A nightmare is always someone who used the tub and shaved their legs- ugh, so much hair. What happened here was seeing hair on the flip side of the coin. It became gross and when really thinking about it, hair when on one’s head is considered beautiful but when not attached to the body, disgusting. So I began to read about it. And i began to really understand the psychological impact of hair. As humans, we are covered with hair but we trim, manage, and control our hair as a subconscious method of controlling our animalism. Egyptians shaved all of their hair so that they would be considered higher beings- higher than animals, at least. But when this is our own choice, it is a method of conscious supremacy- when our hair is taken from us against our will, it becomes a situation of shame and embarassment. Holocaust victims were shaved for this exact reason, as a form of emotional rape. They became vulnerable.

So hair became such an obsession of mine and I set out to create “unrequited” or a piece that I often refer to as the hair bed. Working at the bed and breakfast, I became a silent participant in creating a romanticism- a perfect environment, Xanadu even. But I then thought back to the Bridesmaid, hair down- innocent, vulnerable, yet in a position to attract a suitor so also considered sexual and passionate. But what if she does not find her suitor- she then becomes a sad, frail being. The hair bed was a rickety bed i forged out of steel and created a mattress filled completely of hair- long red hair. Of course, color is important here. Historically, red hair is rare and thought of a mystical. Women with red hair were thought of as witches or unruly. I guess if I think about it this would be my first conscious use of red in my work. Red is such an emotional color- women with red hair are considered the same- ever hear the term “fiery redhead?”

While completing “unrequited” I had an accident that severed the tendons in my wrist. This brought the body to a different awareness. I began to feel more vulnerable and the idea of stitching and mending was thrust to the forefront. I took numerous pictures of my wrist (that I never developed however i think I just found the roll of film- FILM- yes film!!). Now with the possible loss of my hand, it weighed so much on who I thought I was. It was frightening but it also was probably the biggest gift i could have ever received. I began thinking about our bodies vulnerability and became fascinated with skin.

I just started to become aware of Kiki Smith and her fearless voracity she depicted the body. She was not afraid to show us at our most animalistic and our most vulnerable.

It probably took a few years for me to have the similar strength to depict the body in this manner. In my pieces “Ode to a Seattle Goose,” I began to exhibit the emotional toll of a relationship I had. It was difficult and exhausting but now enters my use of sugar as a primary medium…….

(stay tuned for my next posting where i talk more about all things sugar)